Women meet lots of guys every day, but only guys with that magical combination turn them on.
1. Men with resources that translate to physical and social "safety" are much more attractive to women than men without. Things such as physical fitness, power, social status, cash income and other material resources make a man very attractive. And many woman will marry because of this attraction.
2. Yet a man has to have more than just the resources, he also has to be willing to share them. This is where emotional attractiveness comes in. Qualities such as warmth, kindness, intelligence, a sense of humor, sociability, trustworthiness and a stable personality make a man EMOTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE. Emotional attractiveness is the foundation on which affection is built upon and many women tend to divorce because of lack of this attraction.
3. That leaves us with one other very important player in this equation - SEXUAL ATTRACTION.
Sexual attraction provides that extra oomph that accounts for a marked increase in interest in each other. In contrast to romantic and emotional aspects of attraction which tend to appeal to the rational part of women's brains, sexual attraction begins in the most primitive area of the brain giving both men and women a shove to want that woman or that man.
Let me explain it like this: A woman can feel and truly believe that she can spend the rest of her life with a particular guy; she feels there is a deep emotional bond, and has no doubt that she and this guy could form beautiful lives together, raise children if they so chose, and have fantastic experiences. The rational part of her brain knows that the relationship would be rich with laughter, support, communication, trust etc. but she will hesitate if there is no sexual attraction in that relationship.
Just a few decades ago, before the sexual revolution, many women would go on with the relationship but with the sexual revolution and the era of "choice", most women opt for "let's be friends". If she does go for the relationship, she may experience dissatisfaction in the relationship and at times, this then leads to cheating or an affair or to a crisis or reevaluation of the relationship.
Sexual attraction is a kind of regenerating energy that makes women (and men) quiver with sensation and anticipation (pounding heart, butterflies in the stomach, sweating palms, weak knees, euphoria and so forth).
This is not just about "having sex' but rather the way a man UNDERSTANDS and INTERPRETS his sexual thoughts, feelings, fantasies, actions and bodily experiences and his ABILITY TO "TRANSFER" those thoughts, feelings, fantasies, actions and bodily experiences to the opposite sex in a way that causes them to also quiver with sensation and anticipation.
Some men do this with so much ease (ready to cause explosions anytime, anywhere), but most men fall somewhere in the great continuum of barely able to cause a ripple and desiring to cause one. The guy at the "desiring" end of the continuum may be a really "nice" guy but unable to inspire stomach butterflies. A woman may even allow him to approach or kiss her but because she doesn't "feel any sparks" she doesn't quiver with sensation and anticipation and she doesn't daydream about him - sexually.
Those heart-pounding and knee-jerk reactions may not last long and often cannot be expected to evolve into a relationship unless there are other stable aspects of romantic and emotional attraction, but at the end of the day, having a woman sexually attracted to you can result in her attitude towards you being more friendly, helpful and easier to work with.
If you are reading this article, you probably already know what I am talking about when I say "her attitude towards you could be a lot easier" to work with.
About the Author
Christine Akiteng is an internationally renowned Sexual Confidence/Dating Coach and author of eBook: The Art Of Seducing Out Of Fullness™. Her unique approach to dating has helped hundreds create positive, constructive, honest and fulfilling relationships.
Christine's websites: http://www.torontosnumber1datedoctor.com and http://www.theartofseducingoutoffullness.com
- baLooT Inc 2007 -
Labels: Dating-Tip, Sexuality
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